Friday, 30 March 2012

Fiscal Responsibility 2012: Let's Sell Alberta to the China!!

So, as many of you should know, but most likely have just discovered, the Conservative government has released it's fiscal budget for 2012. With this very large booklet of paper and numbers comes a continued pledge to balance the books by 2015, just in time for another election! (Yay!)

After some casual reading of this new budget, one can easily see that Mr. Harper has not forgotten his friends and supporters back home in Alberta. The ink on the pages has yet to dry and already people are lamenting over the possibility that these austerity measures are actually real. Some notables to focus on...the cutting of 19,300 public service jobs, the killing of the penny and the fast tracking of proposed energy projects by allowing companies to rush/skip environmental impact studies.

I don't understand why these cuts have to be made and why we really need to put measures in place to speed up the green light that allows companies to drill for oil and gas!? I mean, there is a much more acceptable and rational approach that will be a sure fire way of getting Canada out of this recession and back in the "black" as accountants refer to it.


Alberta shall be known as "You Sheng" or Oil Province of China

That's right, get the oil out of your eyes and understand what I have just proposed. I say the government might as well stop hiding their intentions and just sell the entire physical province of Alberta to China with conditions that grant us royalties for the oil and energy extracted from it!

Stephen Harper loves where he is from and thinks the Conservative party is the only good party for this country. I mean, this budget makes a lot of sense considering Harper's most recent visit to China in an attempt to open more trade and garner a closer partnership. Why not take it a step further and make things interesting? The Chinese will thus be able to fuel their economy in the literal sense and all the while Harper can grin as he eliminates our deficit, while making the Americans huff and puff, all in a single stroke of a pen!

Stephen Harper's Canada

Now you might be saying, this is absolutely crazy! Alberta is currently our only "have" province in Canada and does a lot to support our fiscal strength. That is true, but once that last drop of oil seeps from those sands and once that last bubble of gas comes from a crack in the ground, Alberta is going to drop into "have not" province status in about 5.839672386 milliseconds.

Who wants to be around when that happens, let alone govern a mess like that!? If anything, let China worry about the technicalities, while we bask in the glory of an annual royalty accompanied by a lump sum payment for the initial sale of an entire province. They can even have the work force that occupies Alberta...they go by the name Albertan s or citizens, but if you continue paying them 20 plus dollars an hour, I don't think they will even notice the regime/ownership change!

So, let it be known Canada and the world that I (Anthony) have solved our deficit problem and made the Americans pissed all in one simple solution. We sell Alberta to China, let the corporations suck the life out of it and collect a nice royalty, while our deficit evaporates and these austerity measures lose validity!

Pretty cool right?

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